Convincing myself

I ask myself, why do I look back so much? What's the point of "what could have been"?

I guess that's just my coping mechanism.

I'm slowly but surely letting go, and I'm not giving up C either. I want to give our relationship a chance. Weird thing is that I can't see a future like I used to with the other exes. I don't know if this is a disease or a symptom.

Whatever it is, I hope this fog in my mind clears so that I can devote myself wholly to the deserving in my life.