Things I love about you

Okay, to end off the day on a brighter note, for me, (and maybe you too).

First thing I loved about you, and which I could go on and on and on about; your passion.

It hit me when you first brought me around, when we'd occasionally out to east coast park to cycle. You'd be on whatever bike that I couldn't identify, but all I could think about was that 'Why does this nice looking bike not have a basket??? It would make things so much easier.' Because then, I'd be using the blue Polygon bike which wasn't so beat up but kept me happy cuz I could put my things in the basket while taking a nice ride around. As the days progressed, whenever we approached the skate park, you'd suddenly speed up ahead to disappear into that place, only to come out behind me after I passed. I thought you went to say hi to your friends.

The first time I actually saw you doing stuff in there, I got a shock, and pretty much couldn't watch you for my heart couldn't take it. Then you told me that you'd come here every time you were free, at night mostly. After that I started to take notice of the kind of bikes you had, and that you custom made them made me really impressed because you must have dedicated a lot of time to researching, sourcing and building.

I've never not been impressed with the amount of passion and drive you had, first in bikes, the offroad bikes, then helis and basically anything that moves on wheels. Music was another facet because I couldn't believe it when you played the guitar so well, despite not going for lessons, and yet here I am probably on par on the piano after like that almost 10 years worth of lessons? That was the first time I felt intimidated and inadequate in your light.

Next; your curiosity.

Basically anything I name, you know something about it, and rather in depth too. I love that air you have when you NEED to know about something foreign, and you just have to google it immediately. It's your thirst for knowledge, thirst in life that I love so much, because I am contented to not-know what I don't. Sit back and be contented with my life and all that I feel that I know.

Another; your stability.

If someone were to ask me to describe you, I would say that you're a bowling ball.
You are always steady, never wavering even in your stance, in your beliefs and towards me too. You are always calm, controlled, never leaping into things. All in all, you were always my anchor, whenever I felt flighty and leapt from one thing to another, you were always there to pull me back, calm me down, and we'd roll together, getting there steady, slowly but surely.

Even in distressing situations, you always think things though and never panic.

And like a bowling ball, boy were you smooth. Not, say, to me, but in the way you handled strangers, be it waiters or even passersby, you'd never stutter in your interactions with them. You could get me into a puddle every time you do something like that.

Your warmth.

I don't think I need to elaborate much. You are physically warm by nature, even your hands, radiate heat, And that was perfect to me. You were perfect to me. You were the answer to my cold hands, my shelter from cold winds, and  my heater under cold sheets.


Your hands, your bones.

Getting into physiques, I love how large your hands are, how you can envelope my fist, and even cover my face with your outstretched palm.
I love how dense your bones are too, basically, to me, they are pretty much unbreakable even if I were to exert all my strength and try. You make me feel safe, and you do keep me safe. For once, with you I can let my guard down, I don't have to be the one shielding others, protecting others because I had you. You were like my wall, and your strength is amazing, even you yourself don't know the extent of it.

My wonderwall, you were.

Your OCD.

Your OCD tendencies were the direct opposite of my organized mess. And in a way, I loved how you couldn't stand certain things, be it arrangement of objects or my whole wardrobe condition and had to either have it out of sight, or have your hands at it. I know it is a reflection of your mind and I could always count on you to have your thinking systematic and organized, which was a great relief to my brain, which always wants to be everywhere at once.

Your subconscious.

I guess only you would know what I'm talking about. The way you would gravitate to me, wherever and whenever.

Your love languages.

Touch and Quality Time, both for which I would be happy to abandon everything for, with you. Your cheek rubs, the reassuring hand-on-thigh when we're out in the company of others, and just leaning on each other.
Those Harry Potter marathons, and Supernatural races, pigging out on chips and salsa. I love.

Your Handy-ness.

I love how you're good with tools, good with building and fixing and all. I think I have to attribute like half my academic score in my first year to you. Don't think I would've survived. Even so, you've always been my inspiration with my use of machinery and tools too, even now that you're not here anymore.

Your ravenous appetite.

I've always loved the way how you'd get hungry super easily, maybe to me it is a subconscious indicator of good health and strength. Even the way you guzzle down liquids of all sorts.

Your All-Out-ness.

Even if I was super far away, you'd travel across the whole island, just to meet me for a while. You don't even seem to mind if I ask you for favours like ferrying my family around, fetching me to run errands, or even sending my friends home. You've gone to great lengths for me, and I really do appreciate that.

Your Private Side.

People usually don't see this side of you, and even some of your close friends don't. But I'm glad that I can say that I was there. All the queer faces, the weird and random sounds, gross voice-acting, and discomfort that you feel, singing. I loved every single bit of it. Your infectious laughter when you get tickled, or have tummy farts, mouth farts, everything. Thank you for showing me that.

I could go on and on and on, but my brain's a little tired and my mind is emotionally exhausted once again. And well, it is amazing that I feel happier typing all this out, archiving them somewhere and no tears were shed.

Now you can't say that you don't know what I loved about you.