So many "first"s for me this year.
Other than the first half of the year, where things were all coloured rainbows and sunshine and glitter and anything rose-tinted.
My birthday saw me through my first big bad one. That really opened my eyes, took away my innocence and naivety in a manner of days. My soul was basically sucked out of my body, to keep my sanity somewhere safe.
When I came back to Singapore, dad told me that I would be kicked out next September, homeless after graduation, to learn something about independence, paying my own bills and making my own bed. That should be a good one, upcoming good one. Hopefully I can uproot myself with my strings attached to build my nest someplace strange and beautiful.
Dad has also been letting me go slowly.
He lets me go by giving me bigger responsibilities when I am part of a family trip.
He lets me go by giving me access and control to the family car.
He lets me go by granting me trips overseas (but for good reasons, research).
He lets me go by not questioning my every move.
He lets me go by letting me make the mistakes that I need to.
This is the first time I have been scared of being let go.
Made a few first "no-no"s this year too.
All I can hope is that I've made more rights than wrongs this year.
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